Care Ministry:

 Funeral Guide

When a loved one dies, grieving family members and friends often are confronted with dozens of decisions about the funeral – all of which must be made quickly and often under great emotional duress. Care Ministries, at United Methodist Church of the Servant, would like to provide assistance in the most comforting and efficient way.

When Death Occurs
When the death of a member of the church occurs, or the death of one of their family members, there are a few immediate steps the family should take.

  • call the people you would like to come immediately to be with you
  • request a pastor to come, if you’re comfortable with his/her visit at this time
  • identify who will be a Contact Person to relay your wishes to others

We will need the contact person’s full name, telephone number and cell phone number. Please select a contact person who will be available to communicate often. Your contact person should meet with the family and gather all pertinent information to give to the church.

In a timely manner please gather/do the following:

  • full name of the deceased person
  • official pronouncement of death from a doctor or medical examiner
  • funeral home information & contact person
  • arrange for your selected funeral home to transport your deceased loved one
  • choose a preferred date for the funeral/memorial service
  • identify a date/time for a pastor to discuss the funeral/memorial service
  • call other people you want to know, or who need to know

Your contact person needs to call Vicki Roberds, Coordinator of Care Ministries, (405)721-4141, as soon as possible, with the above information. Appropriate arrangements for the funeral/memorial service will be made in consultation with the Coordinator of Care Ministries.

What will you do/discuss with the funeral director?

  • provide death certificate, or information so the funeral director can secure it
  • provide the attire you desire your deceased loved one to wear
  • will there be a burial or cremation? if there is a burial, where will it be done?
  • have you purchased or do you need to purchase cemetery lots?
  • regarding the services: funeral, memorial, or only a graveside service? where will the services be held: a church, funeral home, graveside, other?
  • choices of funeral home services/merchandise: casket, casket container, flowers, limousine service, police escort?
  • do you want an article/obituary in the paper(s)? If so, which papers?
  • who will write the article/obituary? will a picture accompany the article/obituary?

Music and the Service
The section of hymns, prayers, scripture, and other details of the service is done in consultation with the officiating minister and the Director of Music Ministries. The minister who will officiate the service and the Director of Music Ministries will be contacted, provided with all information, and will call your contact person very shortly thereafter.

Outside Clergy/Musicians: If you would like to use our facilities but desire a minister to officiate the service and/or musician who is not on staff with Church of the Servant, please ask the family contact person to give the minister’s and/or musician’s name and telephone number to the Coordinator of Care Ministries. Our Senior Pastor will determine if this clergy person may officiate. The musical detail of the service is done in consultation with the officiating minister and the Coordinator of Care Ministries.

Funeral Meal
Funeral meals are offered by the church as a courtesy to church members, and are provided for the immediate family up to a maximum of 50 people. Normally we deliver the meal to the home of the family; however, should you prefer the meal to be in the Community Hall, inform the Coordinator of Care Ministries.

If the Community Hall is available, our Funeral Team will coordinate all aspects of this endeavor (coordination and preparation of meal, room set-up, etc). If there are specific requests (a table for pictures, family artifacts, etc.), the family contact person should express these requests in the initial communication with the Coordinator of Care Ministries. If the family would like to bring food items, the family contact person should inform the Coordinator of Care Ministries in the initial communication before the service, and instructions will be given.

Flowers/Guest Book
When the service is held in the Celebration Center, flowers should be placed in the concourse near both entrances to the Celebration Center. The guest book should also be place in the concourse between the entrances. In the Chapel of the Cross, flowers can be placed near the altar. The guest book should be placed near the entrance.

Memorials
Memorial gifts can be given to a church ministry area of the Servant Foundation. Memorial gifts are inscribed in the Book of Memorials. Please request that Care Ministries (or another designated ministry of the church) be noted in the memo section of the check. All gifts can be mailed directly to Church of the Servant.

After the Service is Over
When the service is over, everyone goes home, and you’re left alone. You will need ongoing support as you continue to grieve the loss of your loved one. Church of the Servant has a Grief Support Group that can assist you during this healing process.

It doesn’t matter if your loss happened yesterday or several years ago, experiencing the loss of a loved one is difficult. Our Grief Support Group can offer community, understanding, support and encouragement. This group meets twice a month and when the time comes, they will extend open and loving arms of welcome to you.

Although the grieving period is different for everyone, it does end, and it becomes time to rebuild relationships. Participating in the Rebuilders Seminar is the next step to take to bring healing and hope as you recover from the loss of a loving relationship. The Coordinator of Care Ministries can provide you with information regarding both ongoing ministries.

Remember that God loves and cares for you…and so do we!

 Email Us  |  Phone: (405)721-4141